vvvexation: (Default)
vvvexation ([personal profile] vvvexation) wrote2004-04-02 05:09 pm
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Feeling blah

Over the last week or two I've been more depressed than usual. Probably at least some of that is hormonal, but knowing that doesn't seem to help much. I'm just not finding even the little motivation I usually have--everything seems pointless, and this of course leads to a vicious cycle as the fact that I'm getting nothing done makes me still more depressed. Loneliness is a big chunk of it too, as I'm in one of those places in my life where it seems there's no one I'm super close to, and no one who really can spare much time for me even if I felt I had the right to ask them to, and that doesn't look likely to change any time soon.

Something's gotta give. I just don't know what yet.

[identity profile] satyrblade.livejournal.com 2004-04-03 02:28 am (UTC)(link)
*ASTRAL SATYR HUG*

[identity profile] urbanbard.livejournal.com 2004-04-03 07:31 am (UTC)(link)
Sending hugs your way.

[identity profile] adamchristopher.livejournal.com 2004-04-03 07:33 am (UTC)(link)
Maybe you're just supposed to know that it's a time to be with yourself and learn more about yourself. At least that's what I keep telling myself...

[identity profile] vvvexation.livejournal.com 2004-04-03 07:35 am (UTC)(link)
Maybe. But I'm not sure I'm ready for that at the moment. Until all the medical problems get fixed, I figure it's not the best time for me to experiment with aloneness.

[identity profile] adamchristopher.livejournal.com 2004-04-03 08:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Aah, then trust your instincts. I hope you quickly get plenty of company, affection and support. :)

[identity profile] mactavish.livejournal.com 2004-04-03 08:04 pm (UTC)(link)
I think that feeling you have the right to ask a friend for some time might be something to look at. :) You do. They have the right not to have it to spare right now, but you have the right to ask.

[identity profile] vvvexation.livejournal.com 2004-04-03 08:51 pm (UTC)(link)
I think I feel that if I ask them for what they can't spare, they'll feel pressured to say yes even if they really shouldn't, or if they say no I'll feel rejected.

(Anonymous) 2004-04-06 05:58 am (UTC)(link)
Paging Heller to the crazy wing ;)
I dunno, I sorta maybe agree with Mactavish. Sometimes you just gotta sit and listen to what your mind says, which is scary as hell for people like us, cause our minds say some pretty scary stuff. hey, if it's hormonal than this'll be over soon right? [knocks on wood]

I'm also far from people I care about. I really wish there was something I could do.

Oh yes, happy passover.
*hugs*

[identity profile] vvvexation.livejournal.com 2004-04-06 07:28 am (UTC)(link)
My mind contradicts itself all too often.

BTW, who is this?

Heya

(Anonymous) 2004-04-06 09:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Silly mind, stop messing with v.
Oh yeh, this is Scott :)
When's Spring break at Berkeley? Did/are you having fun?

Re: Heya

[identity profile] vvvexation.livejournal.com 2004-04-07 01:45 am (UTC)(link)
Week before last. Had all my fun the week prior to that. Am now trying to kick Son Of Depression. Being lonelyish doesn't help.

Re: Heya

[identity profile] vvvexation.livejournal.com 2004-04-07 01:46 am (UTC)(link)
So, ya gonna get your own LJ? Eric did. Joiiiiiin uuuuuuuuuuus....