Groaner

[vvvexation]

(crossposted to puns and my personal journal)

I had this thought quite some time ago:

If I used to own a bar...

and then I shut it down and decided to retire...

but later changed my mind and reopened it...

would that make me a re-publican?


But what if I poured out the drinks with a liberal hand?

Comments

[pi216.livejournal.com]

But what if I poured out the drinks with a liberal hand?

Free-publican.

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

Nah, just a cheap-ublican.

[pi216.livejournal.com]

Or if the building was partially torn down around someone in the bathroom, they'd be a pee-rubblican.

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

Or if I couldn't pay off the mortgage, they'd send a repo-blican.

[pi216.livejournal.com]

Maintain a swanky enough place and run tastings and such, and you could be a brie-publican.

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

With a little landscaping, I could be a tree-publican.

[pi216.livejournal.com]

... Move to Vail and become a ski-publican?

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

Or to Michigan and become an Erie-publican.

[pi216.livejournal.com]

Given the number of long-ee sound words and fragments in the English language, this could go on interminably with little reflection on our talents for anything other than thinking of a nonsense syllable and setting up some kind of situation to explain it.

That being said, I'm closing on a 'Simplify, simplify' note and saying you'd already be a she-publican ;) .

[emmett-the-sane.livejournal.com]

Are you suggesting that we should crumple up and toss this whole silly conversation into a wee public can?

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

Well, we prob'ly can if we want to.

[lrc.livejournal.com]

I figured out why we repeated the waterfowl punfest the other night, one good tern deserves another.

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

*gasp* You sit heron my journal and try to start that up again?

[hitchhiker.livejournal.com]

waterfowl thing to do!

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

I know! What kind of gull does he think I am?

[lintqueen.livejournal.com]

As a long-time Spider Robinson fan, I have to admit that as much as I liked the Callahan series, they struck me as somewhat implausible (did I make that word up?) *not* because of the talking dogs or time travel, but because of the patrons, who could toss about puns so rapidly. No one can really do that, I thought!

I stand corrected. I'd play too, but I haven't a punny bone in my body.

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

That bugs me too, actually. I mean, we can't do it quite that fast either...the wonder of using text means we get to think for a while before posting.

[skywalker404.livejournal.com]

Speaking as a truly horrific punster, you actually can. I have had numerous extremely amusing (and long, on the order of 20 minutes) conversations entirely consisting of throwing puns back and forth. Topics have varied from human sex organs (that one gets repeated a lot, unsurprisingly) to film/cameras and many other stranger things.

And that's a lovely pun, by the way. Who was the pour person who you told it to first? Hee hee.

[saizai.livejournal.com]

(Greg, V. V, Greg. *points to both* Zie's my friend.)

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

Oh, I've had such conversations too. It's just that typically--at least when there are just two people--there are a lot of pauses of up to a minute while the next person tries to think of something. I've never been in a conversation where everybody had a pun at the ready within an instant, is what I meant.

[skywalker404.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that's exactly what I'd meant. In all of those conversations, the other person/people would come back with a response in less than 10 seconds (usually more like about 1 or 2). You can tell when you're both running out of ideas, because it starts taking longer & longer (10-30 seconds) to think of a good retort. Once it gets to 40 seconds- 1 minute, we usually give up. (Unless someone can suggest an alternative, but related, topic, in which case we're off and running again).

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

Ah. My friends and I don't tend to give up when the pauses get that long. There gets to be this sort of "must get in the last word" mentality.

[peaceofpie.livejournal.com]

Just make sure you have a profitable enough bar that you can afford to eat nutritious food every day.

Otherwise, you could be cheap grub lickin'...

[vvvexation.livejournal.com]

Oh, I already am.