Entries tagged with spam

Current Mood: perplexed

Entry tags:

Apparently, they want nothing from me

I just finished my sporadic spam-folder check, and once again I am bemused. In addition to the usual offers to "bigger my short d1cck" and one attempt to convince me that I've won a lottery I never entered ("we don't sell tickets, we just use a 'cyber ballot system' to pick a random email address as our yearly winner--because we want to 'reward individuals who spend their time and resources surfing the web'")--oh, and one notice from a bank where I don't have an account, telling me they might have to suspend my account unless I clear up these reports of suspicious activity (read: tell them my credit card number), and quite clearly addressed to ten people besides me *snerk*--I've also received two pieces of blank junk mail. No subject, no text, and no sender either--so it's not even possible to reply to it.

Is this just a preliminary attempt to see which addresses don't bounce, or what? You wouldn't think they'd need to bother with that, right?

It's actually kinda eerie. I feel like it must be a setup for something weird, 'cause if it isn't, I can't explain it at all.

Current Mood: amused

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Parents are giving their kids awfully strange names these days....

I just love it when spammers generate fake names using dictionaries instead of phone books. This mailing list I'm on has been getting a string of nearly identical junk emails from people like:

Bemoaned K. Kickoffs
Grandstand V. Straplesses
Hairbrushes A. Fiendish
Proton Q. Flicks
Telephoto V. Informed
Saskatoon G. Naysayer
Temporizing P. Apathetic
Conformists J. Cyclamen
Cenotaph E. Effeminacy
Clue G. Mysteried
Progresses K. Minuend
Stalked P. Disneyland

Actually, Stalked P. Disneyland and Telephoto V. Informed sound almost threatening. I wonder if I could sic the law on them for intimidation, just to screw with them.

Current Mood: disappointed

Entry tags:

Let down by tinned meat

Dang it. When I caught sight of the line "I salute you in the name of the most High!" at the top of the latest email in my spam folder, I thought I was going to be invited to join a fringe religion. But alas, it was just a 419 scam.

Current Mood: spamful

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People who could really use a dictionary

The latest piece of junk mail to arrive on my doorstep contains

"Documents Prepared Exclusively For
[my name]
Or Current Resident."

*snigger*

Current Mood: perplexed

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Targeted un-advertising?

Weirdness. I just got an email to which Gmail didn't see fit to attach any ads at all. It was very short, just a line or two about the time and place of an upcoming rehearsal, so that might be why--but then, I got another very short email within the last couple of days that had some completely unrelated ads attached to it--ads for domain hosting and suchlike. I can see why they'd throw in random ads if there weren't enough keywords for targeted ads, and I can also see why they'd just skip the ads in a case like that, but not why they'd alternate instead of doing one or the other consistently.

Current Mood: snickering

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Random pieces of amusement

The latest silly spam: "I just want to say i love you and the crabs"

(followed by a large blank space and then seven words that seem to have been pulled out of a hat)

I'm touched. Some crustaceophile out there loves me enough to be cryptic at me. I'm a little sad, though, that they didn't tell me their name so I could show my appreciation. Apparently "123host255330@rogers.com" would rather adore me from afar. But really, you'd think someone who loves me so much would've included a link to the private website that they'd put up with the help of some friends as soon as they turned 18, wouldn't you? I mean, they must have one. It's a legal requirement before you can spam people. Either that or you have to be a prestigious non-accredited university. Emphasis on prestigious.

Come to think of it, the subject line does say "You too can have a college degree, easier than u think! x5m2." But that's kind of useless if they're not going to tell me how, n'est-ce pas?

In other news from the weird, a couple blocks down from my house there's a square of sticky paper attached to a tree trunk labeled "Government Insect Trap: Do Not Remove." I am highly amused by the notion of government flypaper--it's almost funnier than government cheese. I presume they're collecting data on how many of each type of insect are flying around various places, rather than vainly trying to reduce the number of pests that populate the great outdoors.

Current Mood: not that gullible

Entry tags:

2004.05,
spam

Gee, I wonder if this email is legitimate

From : service@paypal.com <service@paypal.com>
Reply-To : <service@paypai.com> <--[It may not be obvious depending on which font you're using, but PayPal here is spelled with a capital i [Edit: Okay, that's even weirder; it shows up as a capital i in Courier and a lowercase i in Verdana]]
Sent : Thursday, May 27, 2004 7:46 PM
Subject : PayPal Service Fraud Warning !

Dear PayPal valued member,
Due to concerns, for the safety and integrity of the PayPal
community we have issued this warning message.

It has come to our attention that your account information needs to be renew due to
inactive members, spoof reports and frauds.
You must to renew your records and you will not
run into any future problems with the online service.
However, failure to update your records will result in account deletation.
This notification expires on May 31, 2004.

[blahblahfollowthislinkblah]

Guess I'd better to send them my informations right away if I don't want my account deletated, eh?

Incidentally, how the hell can I suddenly have such a bad crick in my neck after having the shit massaged out of it last night?

Current Mood: zonked

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2004.05,
spam

Spam milestone?

I just got a piece of Dutch spam! At least I think it's Dutch. I would say I think it's the first time I've ever gotten foreign-language spam (unless you count ASCII garbage as a foreign language), but I suspect I've probably gotten Spanish spam or something at least once before and not even noticed. But Dutch is much more interesting.

Then again, I probably find this more amusing because it's 2 in the morning and I just got back from a Party of Much Nift. More details after I've slept a bit.

Current Mood: amused

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Sometimes I wonder about those spammers

The latest piece of spam in my inbox reads "You Must be Stupid if You dont Sign up for a FREE Membership To Watch White Trash Girls Doing Big Black Meat for a Cigarette!"

Apparently their product is doing such a bad job of selling itself that they've had to resort to attacking people's sense of self-worth in much the same way those penis-enhancement folks have been doing. Somehow, I doubt shaming people into viewing pr0n will work nearly as well as shaming people into trying to enlarge their weenies--superficially related as those things might seem.

(Personally, I think they could improve their luck a lot more if they tried leaving out the cigarettes. I know I'd be more inclined to watch porn that didn't have cancer sticks in it.)